It is comfortable to do things the same, think the same, and to solve problems using the same paradigms to which we've become accustomed. Living out of habit (not a bad thing is some situations) is quite natural for all us. But doing the same thing over and over expecting different results is, as Albert Einstein is thought to have said,. the definition of insanity.
Sometimes we need to think laterally, or vertically, or just different in some other way.
Occasionally, life will throw something at us that forces us to change our habitual way of being. Other times we have to work at it ourselves.
Sharing a home with other people has changed my habitual patterns dramatically. Very few of my former ways of doing things exist anymore (I don't miss them) and I never know what I am going to find laying about, who will be in the house, or what the atmosphere will be like when I walk in the door.
I'm using a bathroom as an example*.
The shower I use is populated with baby items.
One morning recently, as I was preparing to shower,
I was greeted by a baby bath tub
still filled with baby bath water.
The sink in the same bathroom has a sponge, baby toothpaste, and a dental hygiene tool
(you don't want to know what it was used for).
Each appeared on the sink at different times
Over the weekend, these appeared between the sink and the toilet.
.
I'm sure some of you have similar experiences related to sharing a home with others.
There are many ways I could react to these minor changes in my routines. I could become a little upset, pissed off, or mildly annoyed. I could adopt a stoic attitude. I could find it amusing. I'm sure you can think of other reactions because each of us is different.
The whole thing reminds me of Baba Hari Dass's chalkboard story about the shoe. A small child hides your shoe and you become upset at the child. The real reason you are upset is your attachment to the shoe. Not something we are predisposed to realize. And \it is harder to see in some situations than others (like the death of a loved one). But it is the attachment that is the problem, not the missing shoe or the child (who we probably are more attached to than the shoe).
Most my adult life I've been saying attachment is the trap. It is my expectations of the way things 'should' be, my desires, my wants, and my attachments that cause my pain. The vast majority of the time, it isn't the situation.
Regarding all the bathroom examples, they don't annoy me, they entertain me. They are great photo blog fodder and more importantly, they get me out of my 'box' a little more, expanding my world.
And that is a great thing!
I'm not saying we shouldn't plan.
I'm not saying we shouldn't love or want to better our lives.
I'm not saying we shouldn't expect the best life has to offer.
I am saying, seeing life events as lessons and growth opportunities is a wonderful way to expand and think laterally instead of in habitual ways. Often, the detours are the most interesting ways to get from one place to another.
I think conservationist Lawrence Anthony was onto something when he said, "I have never understood the saying 'To think outside the box.' Why would anyone sit inside of a box and then think outside of it. Rather just get out of the box." That makes a lot of sense to me.
So, which way is out? How do you get outside your life patterns? How do you expand your world? Do you even what to?
*The things in the bathroom don't remain where they are. They move to their real homes quickly. The stuff just worked for the ideas in the blog and never annoyed me at all.
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